Monday, 22 May 2017

Redeeming May // Celebrating our Boy

It was a special weekend, and one which marked a lot of anniversaries... The first wedding anniversary of my sister and her hub, the one year anniversary since our building work started, and a certain little man's official due date finally came round. 

Yesterday Elias hit 40 weeks gestation.

And with that date I breathed a sigh of relief. At last I am in chartered territory, and Elias looks, and feels, like a newborn now. This is a road I have walked before - three times. 8lb babies are my comfort zone - so much less fragile than the 5lb 4oz he hit at his lowest weight.

And when I look at him, I no longer see skin and bones - I see life growing, cheeks filling out, scrawny legs beginning to fatten.

He is perfectly made. He always was. But seeing that little body growing and thriving brings so much joy to my Mama heart.

And so we celebrated him, yesterday, in the way we have always celebrated our newborns when we have brought them home. Elias has been home 4 weeks already, but in all the drama and trauma, we thought we'd hold off until things had settled down, and celebrate the due date instead.

And that we did in style.

Of course, a certain little man slept through the entire proceedings! But not before being smothered in love by his siblings!

It has been a May full of joy, and progress and thankfulness... And it was only as I stood in church this morning and sang the words...

                                                        Turning tragedy to triumph
                                                          Turning agony to praise
                                                      There is blessing in the battle
                                                   So take heart and stand amazed

                                    Rejoice! When you cry to him he hears your voice!
                                                      He will wipe away your tears
                                                   Rejoice! In the midst of suffering
                                                            He will help you sing!

And that's when the penny dropped.

For the past four years, May has been my month of horrors... Full of the memories of a nightmare. A long, dark month in hospital with our tiny, and dangerously sick, baby girl. And as each May has rolled around, I have been filled with a sense of foreboding and dread.

Not so now. 

Those memories of dark hospital days with Heidi will forever be etched on my mind, but they no longer hold May hostage.

Instead I see my little girls running round the garden with their little brother, while their littlest brother snoozes in the background.

Welcome back May. We are ready for good memories.

And thank you Lord for redemption... On the wonderful, epic scale of the cross, but also on the smallest scale... Even as small as redeeming the month of May.

Friday, 19 May 2017

Two Steps Forwards, One Step Back

Humbling seems to be the word to define this season of life at the moment. It seems that "getting back on my own two feet" is a state I'm going to have to wait a little longer for. On Tuesday, I did all three school runs, I managed to do some chores around the home... for the first time since March, I felt like the end of dependence on others was in sight.

Tuesday, 16 May 2017

A Little Oily Love / Farewell Verruca!

It all began back in November when, after her swimming lesson one week, Ava came to me complaining of a sore foot. We looked at the sole of her foot... And there it was - the little white circular culprit.

A verruca.

Monday, 15 May 2017

Baby Tales // One Month!

Dear Elias...

One month old, and not yet due! It's a funny old place we find ourselves in... In between somehow. And yet your teenyness is gradually going, you are growing, little man, and now, though already one month old, you finally feel like a newborn. You are behaving like a newborn too... Sleeping a lot, but having some wake time, feeding well and starting to grow a little more chubby. It's strange to think you might not have been here yet... That at the same 'age' (you would now have been 39 weeks gestation), all three of your siblings were still tucked up in my tummy (in fact, your brother would still be in there another three weeks!) and yet how already we cannot imagine life without you. We would feel so incomplete without you here now.

Saturday, 13 May 2017

Our Little Tribe // Siblings in May

From the youngest age, I always wanted a big family... something about having a little brood around me, playing happily in the sunshine, lots of laughter and fun and exploration. Of course the reality can look somewhat different... the laughter often turns to bickering, the sun doesn't always shine and four under six is no walk in the park!

Friday, 12 May 2017

Healthy and Whole On The Go // Scrummies Review and GIVEAWAY!

There are certain areas of parenting I always want to get better at. In different seasons, and at different times, different things will raise their heads. Something will start to niggle, I'll do a bit of research and soon enough we're shifting and changing routines and structures as a family. One area I've become convicted of and researched a lot this past year is a desire to feed this little family of mine healthy, whole and organic foods. I could write a whole blog post on that journey (and I'm sure I will at some point!) but one of the biggest challenges has been coming up with healthy, wholesome snacks that the children can have on the go.

Sometimes a blackened and bruised banana from the bottom of my handbag just doesn't seem that appetising!

Wednesday, 10 May 2017

Hunkering Down // Life Lessons in the School of Humility

We are soaking in these slow days. surrendering to the gentle, steady rhythm of the newborn. Enforced rest and low expectations. Simply surviving one day after the other and being content that that is enough. It's a season I found incredibly intense as a first time mother, but now I am savouring it for all its worth. Perhaps it's the knowledge that this season is so short and will pass, perhaps it's the bittersweet realisation that I will not be in this place again, but while I am eager to be back in the driving seat, I am not rushing the opportunity to recover, and simply focus on this precious little bundle we have been entrusted with.